Thursday, June 11, 2009
My Grandma passed away a few months ago. She and my Grandpa raised me from 6 months of age. She was 84 years old when she passed. I miss her very much. I really could never imagine what life would be like without her. I wasn't sure how I could live without her but I knew that a MAJOR part of my life would be gone and I would be left to try hold my life together without the woman who was always there for me, who always, always loved me no matter what. I miss her.
After she passed away, I was so much in despair. I was reading in the scriptures because the LORD says, "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." I began to read in the book of II Samuel 1:1-27 (not for any particular reason, in fact it had been quite a while since I had read anything from the book of Samuel) and the story there was about David and his loss of Johnathan who was like a brother to David and the LORD really spoke to my heart and my situation through this and comforted me out of His word. In the story Johnathan was like a brother to David and David loved Johnathan dearly. II Sam 1:25 David said that Johnathan was slain in his high places meaning that when Johnathan died, he was where the LORD intended for him to be, this reminded me that my grandma was in the LORD's hand. She trusted Him and believed the things He said to be true so He was with her where she was even in death. II Sam 1:26 David said "I am distressed for you my brother Johnathan, very pleasant have you been unto me, your love to me was wonderful, passing the love of women, how are the mighty fallen!" He was in such distress and sadness for this brother who he loved so dearly, who was now gone. I understood David's heart and his mourning. I was broken for my grandmother knowing that her love was wonderful to me and how it would be so deeply missed. And, how are the mighty fallen...she was mighty! She endured a body that gave out on her long ago and still trusted that Yahuah was true even when she did not see healing, even when she could not get out of bed. Even though life was so not what she longed for it to be. Always talking of being pleasing to the LORD. She was mighty in battle! ISamuel 18:1-3 says; "The soul of Johnathan was knit with the soul of David and Johnathan loved him as his own soul..." Wow, what love he had for his brother, he loved him as if he were one with himself! The scripture says "the life of Johnathan was bound up with the life of David." Tied together.
When the LORD places a love in our hearts we become bound up, tied together and when we become separated the wound is great. My grandma asked the LORD to give her a little girl 44 years ago and He sent me to live with her. She always said I was a gift from God to her and she loved me. She always loved me no matter what I did or didn't do. She was not my Grandma by blood (that's a long story)but she bound herself to me and I was bound to her.
I Samuel 20:42 Johnathan tells David to "go in peace", for as much as they two had made a covenant and sworn in the name of the LORD (Yahuah), saying, "the LORD be between me and you and between my seed and your seed forever." Johnathan sends David off with a blessing basically and tells him to remain in peace even while they are physically separated because the LORD has bound them together forever and even their seed. I felt this to be a blessing to me also because it reminded me that the LORD wants me to be in peace even though we are apart. And even though we're apart we are still bound together, because of His promises of eternal life, forever! She trusted Him and tried to live the way He asks us to do. I trust Him and know that what He says is true. We have hope to be with the LORD and to be together again! The LORD has been good to me to comfort me by His word. I still miss her very much but I am thankful for His promises of life if we follow Him.